


Toto, I Have A Feeling We're Not In Kansas Any More

by JMount74



Series: Whumptober 2020 [16]
Category: Thunderbirds
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-22
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:47:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27153367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JMount74/pseuds/JMount74
Summary: How did John suddenly find himself on a horse, lance in hand, about to joust with a knight?
Series: Whumptober 2020 [16]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1946881
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	Toto, I Have A Feeling We're Not In Kansas Any More

**Author's Note:**

> Whumptober Prompt 20: Toto, I Have A Feeling We're Not In Kansas Any More: Medieval

The man dressed as a knight should have been a dead give-away. 

As should his horse and the long decorative pole he was holding.

But John was a man with a meticulous mind, and nothing about this call-out had said ‘expect a knight about to joust’.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. Wishing Scott was here to take charge, he ‘dismounted’ from One as the knight dismounted from the horse.

‘Percy?’ John asked. That was the name of the contact who had called for IR’s help. Rather than say yes, the knight performed an elaborate bow, at least as much as one could in a full suit of armour, and replied: ‘Yes, good sir, it is I, Sir Percival De Winter, knight of Devon, at your service.’

Ah…so he was going to stay in character? This could make things a little awkward. John did not want to offend, but the rescue should take precedence. ‘I understand that there has been a collapse into a sinkhole?’ The quiet sniggering in his ear told him that Gordon was on the comm.

‘You are most correct, my good sir. If thou wouldst follow my good self and my steed, I will endeavour to convey you forthwith to the, ah, arena.’ Rolling his eyes, John followed the now loud and clunky knight. He could probably have walked there quicker on his own.

Virgil’s voice came over the comm, announcing that they were arriving and were going to put down next to One just to be safe. John murmured his agreement and estimated that they would indeed arrive at the scene the same time as he did at this rate.

They caught up with John just as he reached the sinkhole. The scene was like a movie stage. There were a lot of people milling about, and EOS informed John that there were 73 life signs where he and his brothers were, and 8 in the sinkhole, plus one horse.

Gordon stood and stared. There were people dressed in medieval clothing, long flowing dresses with tall scarf-draped hats, men dressed in armour, others in what he assumed were leggings and long t-shirts. All had funny shoes on. There were seven knights and six horses in total, and each knight wore a scarf tied around the elbow of their armour.

What got Gordon the most was all the “thee’s” and “thou’s” and “privy, my good sir’s”. It did not take long for the grin to appear.

Virgil was all business. He asked about the people in the hole – 3 maidens, 4 serfs and a knight with his horse – and set about checking the security of the ground with EOS’s help. He was polite and replied appropriately to Percy when addressed. Sir Percival was ecstatic that someone in IR understood the correct protocols.

Determining that the ground around was in no danger of imminent collapse, and it was not really a sinkhole but a break in the soil that had collapsed into a natural cave not that deeply set under the ground, Gordon and John set about clearing the area so Two’s VTOL didn’t fry anyone too close while Virgil went and retrieved his lady. It took two trips down with the rescue platform, the second one to rescue the horse. By this time the horse was terrified, but John had always had a way with the animals, so he went down with the platform to retrieve the frightened animal.

By the time everyone was above ground where they should be, there was a general loud whispering to be heard among all the people present. Sir Percival was asked to present the gallant knights of International Rescue with the jousting trophy as a fairly won prize, but none of them were going to accept that.

Virgil cleared his throat. ‘Good people of the land, myself and my gallant order of knights have merely fulfilled our quest. We thank you wholeheartedly for the great honour you would seek to bestow upon us, however, we feel that, since this was a quest fulfilled rather than a battle to the death as befits a noble joust, we must respectfully decline.’ John sighed in relief. He was getting worried for a moment there.

‘However,’ Virgil continued, twinkle in his eye as his brothers both turned to him with questioning faces, ‘If thou wouldst accept our humble challenge, then Sir Johnathan of Kansas would face one knight to win the fair prize.’

John’s face was now beetroot red. Gordon was almost literally rolling around the floor. Virgil turned his sweetest smile on both of them. Sir Percival gratefully agreed to fight Sir Johnathan to the death for the honour of a kiss from Maid Alice. Maid Alice turned out to be about John’s age, with deepest purple hair and dress to match, and several nose, ear and eyebrow piercings. She was chewing gum.

Gordon had been recording stealthily but handed this over to EOS as he once again was rolling around laughing. Virgil looked at his older brother, heaved him into the saddle of the horse provided and called out loudly, ‘For the honour of Kansas and IR.’ Gordon intoned this statement too and suddenly John found himself at one end of a list field facing Sir Percival, a lance in hand and breastplate being hastily fitted. 

Then the horse, who obviously knew what he was doing, charged along at the same time the other horse took off.

John screwed his eyes shut the entire time. So it came as a bit of a shock to not be knocked flying. Indeed, there did not seem to have been an impact either way. As he felt the horse turn around, he opened his eyes to see Sir Percival on the ground, horse beside him as if wondering what on earth he was doing.

There was a pause for a moment, then a cheer went up. Apparently, unseating a knight meant John had wone. His ‘squire’ came over, grabbing the horse’s reigns before John could dismount, and led him over to get his kiss.

John looked around for his brothers. He did not want this! However, they seemed to have miraculously disappeared, leaving John to his fate. As the crowd cheered even louder, he accepted a kiss on his cheek and the purple scarf from the Maid and was assisted to dismount.

Struggling out of his breastplate, his was annoyed and relieved to see Virgil heading his way. Returning to their ships, John shot Virgil a look that promised retribution. Virgil smiled sweetly.

‘You’ll think twice before allowing Gordon to prank me next time,’ he replied, and John had the good grace to look slightly caught out. Virgil’s grin widened. The prank may have been weeks ago, but it had been an opportunity too good to miss.


End file.
